As a mediator, I encourage plain speaking in our mediation sessions. You , as a couple , are addressing serious stuff. You had a serious relationship, and it is respectful to the good times that relationship gave you both , to address the "de-coupling" as seriously.
It is accepted of course that apart from what happens in the mediation room , there are outside influences. They maybe well meaning friends
and relatives , lawyers too . But with you both tracking through your personal views and experiences , your finances , and not least your childrens needs.....do not overlook, you both created something unique , your relationship . So respect the need for you two alone to find tha pathway forward that suits you both . If you achieve that consensus....it is a jewel to polish , an arrangement retaining your self respect , in the knowledge that you both worked out your pathway forward , and with children , remodelled the family for their sake.